I've always liked the idea of being a Hero, but deep down I always knew I was a Villain. Villains are the more colorful characters in a story. In a sense, Villains guide and direct the story, largely because Heroes are one dimensional and understandable while Villains are much more complex.
In reality, it has never been Good versus Evil. What it is is that Villains are agents of Justice, while Heroes are agents of Mercy. Heroes often lead double lives, and live in disguise in hopes of being an accepted member of the very society that would reject them if they ever found out who they truly were. Villains are very aware of who they are, have accepted their identity, and have no strong desire for acceptance or to belong. Neither the Hero or the Villain chooses to be who they are, and in many ways spend their lives trying to reconcile themselves with this fact.
As a part of my healing process, I've been spending a lot of time with my subconscious mind. I discovered that I was buried beneath my belief systems. I learned that as I adopted new belief systems there were parts of me that retreated to the dark corners of my being and that, if I remove social expectations, I will appear to myself again.